moving right along eh?

cuddled? check.
dates? check.
kiss? pending request.

this only happens in the movies ladies

i saw a man. his perfection in beauty will not soon be forgotten by my heart, nor my mind.
as i describe him, you need to envision this beauty in your mind in the most flawless, perfect way imaginable.

lets begin.

about 6'3, long long torso.
skinny/slender/lean, but with broad shoulders and the most beautiful defined back muscles (again note the long torso).
white fitted cotton t-shirt, with dark wash slim jeans. zippers on the pockets (ya i looked)

oh, and his HAIR
you know that move men do that makes us ladies swoon?
you know, when they run their fingers thru their long wavy hair?
ya, he did that. and you better believe i swooned.

now imagine the most perfect golden blonde, with natural caramel highlights. with an underlying dark tone, and almost even a little greasy looking.
nothing short of perfection. am i right?

then, he turned and looked at me
i lost consciousness.
chiseled roman nose, bright gorgeous green eyes
dark brows
rugged beard.
holy hell.
is anyone else drooling?

here's the kicker tho, as he walked by he obviously saw i was falling in love with him,
and he so kindly shot me one of his sparkly white crooked smiles.
right?
i must see him again.

if any of you see this man
before you pursue,
please keep in mind,
i saw him first.

bless.
cami

saturday night

what if he's just too good to be true?

wishing to find my breaking point.

there are times in your life when you just feel like breaking
you feel like breaking would be the release to all the angst built up in you
like the emotions would somehow just race out of your chest and be gone forever.
usually when you feel like breaking away, you already feel completly broken.
maybe

mostly, yes, I'm mostly broken, but not yet completely.
mostly you start to feel like you're already broken when you've started to mend.
i need to start that mend.
i need to know i've broken all i can and i can finally start to heal
i don't want to sit here, with open wounds, knowing i haven't even had the worst of it
awaiting my nightmare
just crying over the horror i know will come.

but it wont come.
it's not coming!!
why must it be delayed!
i want it to all be over
resolved
sustained
and beautiful, once again.

goal

first rule to happiness:
free your heart

thought of the day

Radiohead is neither music nor noise
it's ART

i love to see...

that look boys get when you know they're thinking
"i love you"

it has come to this.

all i need in life anymore is


1. netflix
2. puzzles
3. a plane ticket outta here

so there's this guy

and the way he smiles makes me smile.
and the sound of his voice makes my heart skip a beat.
and when i see him i get butterflies.

:)

after all this time?

i still:

-fall every time i see him.

-blush at any mention of him.

-get butterflies thinking of him.

-see there's a meaning to all this.

and i still know i love him.

after love at first sight, and many years of heartbreak, and many years of patience.

he entered my life again, and what began was 

wonderful, perfect, unbelievable happiness.

hope, prayers

The Lord is always on our side, and always cheering us along
sometimes we are too angry or ignorant to see it
but He'll always be there and He, and everyone around us, always want us to come back to Him.
and if not for Him, then for the people around us it matters to.

hot cross buns.

i feel light, i feel happy. i feel hopeful.
i feel like my life is finally happening and it's EVERYTHING I've been waiting for.

i feel like there are a million words floating around in my head, but none of them are right.

i feel all the beauty around me getting more vibrant as
every second takes me closer. 
i fell like finally it's okay, and it really was all for a reason. i'm grateful.

i'm living now,
and taking life fully by the reins and heading in head first.
there's an interesting spirit about me now, that little girl inside me is growing up and becoming a real woman now. a real woman with a lot of spirit in her. now i'm always smiling at new and beautiful opportunities that become the music around me.

i want to run around and tell the whole world.
i want to kiss him on the mouth and have him be forever mine.

my future with him is finally more bright than my past.
he's so real 
and even more wonderfully perfect than i ever thought. he's got this smile that makes me feel innocent and young again. and i blush every time.
he reminds me of better days, of days i forgot i missed.

oh boy...
8 years of wishful thinking, and now it's come to this
WOOOOOT

bless you,
cami :)